So, sometimes I feel like I'm on a game show. This particular game show is inspired by Name That Tune.
Scene--3 contestants, all women. One announcer, let's call him Sam (don't tell him I told you, but I think Sam secretly wishes he could be the voice over for movie trailers. Or that someone would pay him to read books on tape where all the characters have different accents. I digress. . .).
A table in the center of the stage.
A lovely, under-dressed woman brings out the first challenge: an adorable 6 month old baby boy (named Jacob) wearing just a diaper.
Contestant #1: Well Sam, I think I can change that diaper with 5 wipes.
Contestant #2: I pass.
Contestant #3: I can change that diaper with 4 wipes!
(Dramatic music)
Announcer: Okay, before we proceed, we're going to open the diaper. Let's take a look! (I won't describe it here, too gross for most people).
Contestant #2: I'm going to hold--I can do it with 4 wipes.
Contestant #1: I'm a little nervous, but I think I can do it with 3 wipes.
Contestant #2: CHANGE THAT DIAPER!
Announcer: Can she do it? Let's see folks! Wow, look at her go--using the front of the diaper to wipe that baby virtually clean. Now one wipe has been used. Now two--and the baby is clean! Judges, can you verify for us? Yes folks, she has changed the diaper in just 2 wipes. She wins $500 for making her bid, and an additional $500 for using even less wipes.
Thanks for tuning in, and we'll see you in a few hours for CHANGE THAT DIAPER!
1 comment:
I can totally relate! I've overheard my Sam changing a diaper and say "Kiddo, I'm going to need a third wipe. Mom probably could have done it in one, but I need three." :)
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